Self-Isolation: Wrap-Up and Next Steps

What a time this has been.

Most of you who are reading this have probably seen, either through this website or on my Instagram, that I spent my self-isolation period taking one Polaroid for every day that I was home (there are 50 days and 51 photographs total, for any new visitors out there). I am officially back at work now, and can therefore no longer call any new images “Self-Isolation,” because I am no longer technically self-isolating (though I am not going anywhere except for to work — rest assured that I am still taking all possible precautions, because I understand that this crisis is FAR from over). Because this series has ended (unless another lock-down happens in the future, in which case, expect a part II), I wanted to sit down and take the time to a) talk about my experience making this new series of work and b) discuss my plans for the future and a few exciting things that are happening.

If you aren’t aware of my past work, I am a photographer who works primarily with Polaroids, and I use the medium to explore my surroundings and what “home” means to me (feel free to read my bio to get the expanded explanation). I began the body of work entitled Home in the fall of 2017 when I was beginning to work on my senior portfolio for my BFA program, and have been photographing my home since my first college photography class in the spring of 2015. Clearly, I have spent a lot of time thinking about my surroundings and the meaning that I draw from them, so, to me, picking up my Polaroid camera and expanding my Polaroid collection was a natural response to being stuck at home due to the current pandemic.

One thing I found myself doing while creating this series, which can both stand alone and be integrated into my already-existing body of work, something that was important to me when beginning this project, was finding new ways to explore parts of my home (and the front and back yards surrounding it) that I have already explored in photographs before. I experimented with new angles, zoomed in on specific scenes, and even managed to find a few things that have yet to be photographed, either because I haven’t gotten around to them or because they have changed over the past two-and-a-half years. Doing this series has re-invigorated my work in a way I did not believe was possible, and it has encouraged me to continue with a series that, a year ago, I proclaimed I was closing the doors on. I have been genuinely excited to make work every day, and not being able to call the series “Self-Isolation” anymore does not mean that I won’t continue to make photographs as often as I can.

I said in my last blog entry that I had not yet decided how I want to continue with my work; one idea that I have had that I want to try out is making a “Photo of the Week” post each Saturday to highlight my favorite image from that week, and continuing to put photos up on my Instagram and in my Polaroid gallery on this website. This seems the most reasonable way for me to continue to share my work without overwhelming the blog with new entries, since I want to get back to writing about photography and don’t want it to get lost in a sea of photographs or to disrupt the flow of any posts I am making (I hope that all makes sense). Another thing I have been doing during this time is playing with some new digital work that involves the use of crystal balls also known as crystal ball refraction photography, some of which you can find in the “film and digital” section of my site, and I am hoping to use this technique to add an interesting twist on my home photography sometime in the near future (also, if anyone knows of a reasonably priced macro lens I could add to my wish list, let me know!). Two final ideas I am considering are getting back into film work, since I have found a lab to send film to for development, and really delving into the world of cyanotypes, which I learned to do in a college photography course, but never took much interest in incorporating into my work until recently (I am drawn to these because they are relatively cheap to make and require only sunlight and water for development, making them a great at-home project). All this to say, I have a lot of ideas, and I am excited to explore all of my creative options.

Finally, I want to mention that I got a public feature in a local news article about photographers using creativity to stay connected during the COVID-19 isolation period, which I encourage you to check out here, since there are 4 other talented locals featured that I think you all should check out. This came as a total but welcomed surprise to me this morning, and I am grateful to have my work recognized, especially since I feel that this is the best work I have produced in a long time (thank you so much, Bham Now!).

FINALLY finally, thank YOU ALL so much for loving and supporting my work. I have enjoyed reading your comments and messages, seeing your reposts, and staying connected with you all during this time. I truly believe that creativity brings us all together and helps us to better relate to one another, and nothing has reaffirmed that belief more than seeing the outpouring of love you all have given my work and me over the past several weeks. For the next few days, I will be taking a break in photography to focus on a few life things, but I will be back soon with new photos and new blog posts focusing on a variety of photography-related topics (if there is anything you want me to cover, leave me a comment, send me an email, or message my on my Instagram @kelseycollierphotography — I am always open to suggestions and requests).

Thank you all again for sticking with me; I hope you and yours are well, and may peace be with you.

— Kelsey

Self-Isolation, Day 44: Anxious

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Self-Isolation, Day 44: Anxious

"It takes a lot of imagination to be a good photographer. You need less imagination to be a painter because you can invent things. But in photography, everything is so ordinary; it takes a lot of looking before you learn to see the extraordinary."
— David Bailey

Self-Isolation, Day 32: Strange Things

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Self-Isolation, Day 32: Strange Things

So, I am choosing to forgo a quote for today in favor of catching up with you all.

First, wherever you are in the world, I hope you are doing well. I have been keeping myself busy watching new shows (I just started Cheers) and playing various Nintendo games (Animal Crossing for the win, obviously).

Second, today’s photos, as you may have gathered, did not come out the way I intended. The color one is simply overexposed, and the black-and-white film expired in January of last year (for the record, the color film is expired as well, but, in my experience, the color chemistry holds up better than the black-and-white, at least in older formulations). My initial reaction to the first image was frustration at myself for not exposing it properly (this is one where I probably should have bumped the exposure all the way down or not used the flash, though I haven’t had many good experiences forgoing the flash), and I decided to break my own rules about redoing images and to give it a second chance, albeit in greyscale instead of color; I was, again, frustrated to see that the second image came out looking less-than-desirable. The more I looked at the two images, the more I came to realize that this very thing is what drew me to shooting Polaroids in the first place.

One thing about the process of shooting instant film is that it can be unpredictable. You don’t always nail the exposures, no matter how long you’ve been shooting, and you can’t always know what the film itself is going to do. Every time you put a pack of film into the camera, you’re taking a chance: you’re chancing a bad battery in the cartridge, you’re chancing bad emulsion, you’re chancing accidentally setting the exposure meter up too high or too low, and the list goes on. When I first started shooting, all of this was exciting to me; I didn’t care about “bad” exposures or “bad” packs of film, because that added to the fun of making photographs. The dream-like effects of things such as bad exposure or half-missing emulsion added to the image instead of taking away from it, because, if these images represent memory, time, and the reality that I live in, doesn’t it stand to reason that there should be inconsistencies between the images? After all, memories get blurry, and there are parts that fade away altogether; we never remember things exactly as they were, and some are even pure fiction that exist only in our minds.

Reality right now is strange. It feels as though we’re living in a strange science fiction film — or, as many of my friends have heard me refer to it, a weird Sigourney Weaver movie — instead of in the “real” world (whatever the word “real” means to you — as I have learned, reality is different for everyone — but that’s a topic for another day). Reality is also, much like Polaroid photography, imperfect and unpredictable. The truth is that we never know what’s coming or the impact it will have, but we have no choice but to embrace it, learn from it, and move on, carrying with us the lessons we learned as a result.

To close, this week has been frustrating. I have found myself getting angry over things that I usually don’t think twice about, and that includes the images I shot today. But, once I got over the flickering moment of anger and frustration, I took a second look, and realized that neither of the images were as bad as I had first thought, and that, even though they aren’t perfect, they are still interesting in their own right. Sure, I could have followed my first instinct, which was to chalk these images up to loss and start again, but that did not seem a fair thing to do. For one thing, it is a distinct probability that most, if not all of the images in the black-and-white pack that I have in my camera right now will come out flawed in some way or another, and, given the nature of this project, it would be incredibly stupid and wasteful to shoot until I get the perfect image for the day, because that is not what my work is about. My work is about embracing the good, the bad, and the ugly of everyday life, and showing it to others in hopes that they will find it at least a little bit relatable. Today, I broke my own rule — I tried for a do-over, and it didn’t work out. I tried to make something perfect, but nothing in life is ever perfect — if it were, what would be the fun in living?

Thank you all for sticking with me, and a big thank-you if you read through today’s post. Tomorrow, I will get back to my one-image-with-a-quote-of-the-day posts. I’ll see you then.